Just imagine those faces, merrily tiled across your neatly wrapped gifts, and the joy on your recipient’s faces as they notice and think to themselves, “Wow, [YOUR NAME HERE] sure is a generous, creative, hilarious specimen. I might give them all my money/propose to them/buy them a new car/write an album of songs about how lovely they are/wash all of their dishes forever.”
Big barbarian banquets in front of a roaring fire, feasting on legs of mutton with their bare hands. Swigging on mead and planning their next plunderous voyage while beating each other up for the fun of it and bellowing drinking songs 'til dawn. Those were the days, eh?
The Viking Horn Glass is a throwback to this epic boozy era. Just fill it up with your favourite tipple, raise a hearty toast to Odin and co, then get ready to party like a Viking!
Don't let its primitive roots fool you, this curvaceous goblet is significantly classier than your average carved cow horn, it's made from soda-lime glass and holds up to 480ml of your finest ale or mead.
The horn even comes with sturdy birch wood stand so you can proudly display it on the mantel, you know, next to your sword, shield, the skulls of your enemies etc.
We don't sell golden thrones or rent out teams of loyal manservants - but we know that every aspiring princess deserves their own set of fancy regal robes.
Now you can relax like royalty with our Personalised Luxury Princess Dressing Gown.
Possibly the softest, warmest, snuggliest garment in the entire known universe. Featuring a large hood (to leave room for your crown), as well as two deep pockets for all of your essentials - mobile phone, gold sceptre, share-size bag of Maltesers etc.
And that's not all, we can print the back of this luxurious dressing gown with any name you desire; your own, your kid's, your partner's - just hit the 'Personalise' button and we'll take care of the rest.
Whether you're having a sleepover with friends, settling down for a Disney marathon on the sofa, or going to get the morning papers - make sure you do it in style with our Personalised Luxury Princess Dressing Gown.
From €29.95
To €34.95
You know all those photos on your mobile phone? The lovely heart-warming ones you're always scrolling back through your gallery to find. Well, it's about time you liberated these memories and got 'em immortalised on say, a Personalised Photo and Text Cushion Cover!
Liven up your living space (or someone else's) with this cosy customised cushion, printed with a montage of three of your favourite photos and a cheeky message of your choosing!
Using our simple and intuitive personalisation process, you can easily upload your photos and and arrange them as you fancy. Just hit the Personalise button to give it a try - before you know it you'll cuddling up with your new cushion and admiring your lovely snaps.
Shower his ceramic body with the included set of seeds, add a bit of water, then your work is done. Within days, a beautiful green coat will begin sprouting. Watch it bloom a bit more every day, from a bit of seedy stubble to a lush layer of green goodness.
But what happens after you’ve harvested your first batch? Pick up some more chia seeds from your supermarket and do it all over again! This llama is infinitely reusable.
Tall glasses, short glasses, tulip glasses, dimpled glasses; they say there's a glass for every type of beer and occasion. But what about a special beer glass created just for you?
With our new Personalised Beer Stein, your favourite brew has never tasted sweeter!
This premium tankard has a classy frosted finish for that mouthwatering 'fresh from the cooler' look and features a sturdy, trigger-style handle for easy holding (and hearty cheers-ing).
Just hit the 'Personalise' button to add a cheeky message of your choice (up to 60 characters spread across 4 lines, bad beer puns are hoptional). It could be a special date, the name of your Best Man, a classic quote, a birthday message – you name it, we'll print it.
Cheers to that!
Snuggle up with Pierre and rest your head on his lovely soft shaft - or keep him on your desk to make your colleagues INSTANTLY contact HR to voice their concerns. Treat yourself to this adorable addition to your plush collection - because you’re girth it.
Please note: this is not an accurate to scale version of a human penis. Thank god.
All you have to do is pick out eight of your favourite photos (no easy feat, we know), upload them using our customiser, and we'll print them on a super soft and fluffy microfibre towel.
With our simple customisation process you can easily arrange your pics and even overlay a couple of lines of text to compliment them. There's a large range of font styles and background colours to choose from so it's super easy to get creative, plus there's a nice clear preview of your towel at every step of the way.
Filled with 20 stirring scratch n' sniff scent pads, this chunky cardboard book explores the rich history and evolution of this wondrous drug. Covering all topics from the science behind the munchies (it's very real), the botanical link between beer and weed, and why smoking cannabis makes Pink Floyd sound so damned good.
Entertaining, informative (did you know you could nibble or sniff peppercorns to reduce the paranoia? Incredible.) and beautifully-illustrated — it's the perfect gift for total pot heads or those with just a little cannabis curiosity.
And they're therapeutic for both men and women!
For women:
When the moment strikes, just give these balls a pulverising squeeze and know that if this was real life, the owner of the testicles would be paralysed with fear and pain, dry-heaving and wishing for a swift death. What a calming thought.
For men:
Stop playing trouser billiards like a mucky little ape! It might feel wonderfully relaxing but it's horrific to watch. Keep your hands off your – in all probability – unwashed balls and relieve yourself with this rubber prosthesis instead.*
*although don't stop checking them for lumps n' that. Maybe do it in the shower.
Naked Ramblers are way ahead of the curve, one day we'll all be doing it.
For now, you can dress up your houseplants with this cheeky set of free-loving explorers – a butt-naked reminder to get closer to nature. Oh and to make sure you do some occasional pruning.
