If you like your coffee strong (f*cking strong no less), then what else do you really need to know? Packed and roasted at our London roastery, this powerful brew is a complex and dark-roasted blend of Brazilian and Honduran Arabica Coffee. Full-bodied and f*cking flavoursome, with powerful notes of dark treacle, cocoa and liquorice, complimented by a dense syrupy body.
Stop poisoning your body with unfulfilling freeze-dried rubbish and don't settle for whimpering brands that are afraid to give you what you really want, nay NEED. Make yourself a hot cup of F*cking Strong Coffee and kick-start your day with a potent dose of delicious caffeine-laden euphoria.
Filled with 20 stirring scratch n' sniff scent pads, this chunky cardboard book explores the rich history and evolution of this wondrous drug. Covering all topics from the science behind the munchies (it's very real), the botanical link between beer and weed, and why smoking cannabis makes Pink Floyd sound so damned good.
Entertaining, informative (did you know you could nibble or sniff peppercorns to reduce the paranoia? Incredible.) and beautifully-illustrated — it's the perfect gift for total pot heads or those with just a little cannabis curiosity.
This ingenious floating gizmo projects several seriously psychedelic multicoloured light sequences onto the bottom and sides of the bath. It's truly hypnotic, especially as the pulsating effects are distorted by the water in the tub. Put on some suitably upbeat music, dim the main light and strike that classic legs apart, arm in the air pose and you could be in Studio 54, albeit nude and soaked in hot water. Not such a bad thing in our book.
Battery-operated and water resistant, the Underwater Disco Lightshow features a button that changes the patterns (some subdued, some dynamic), so you can alter the mood in an instant. What's more its curvaceous shape causes the lights to reach out to every corner of the bath. If you're feeling really decadent you could even plop this plastic doodah in your pool, pond or hot tub. Water based shenanigans will never be the same again.
The Underwater Disco Lightshow has been a real hit here at Firebox HQ. In fact we're standing here wrapped in towels having just emerged from our communal bath/disco. Invigorating? We spent the whole multicoloured soak thinking up water-based disco classics to shoehorn into this description. Sadly we could only come up with Car Splosh, Heaven Must Be Missing A Plughole and a few tunes by Splashford and Simpson. Suggestions welcome.
Whether you're chilling out or getting ready for a night on the tiles (no, not the bathroom tiles), this incredible device is guaranteed to add a mesmerising kaleidoscope of light to bathtime. So don't just sit in the tub twiddling your pruning thumbs; order an Underwater Disco Lightshow and Blame it on the Bathtub!
With the Loud Mouth Voice Changer at your disposal you can instantly transform even the most tedious monotone drawl into a loud and exciting voice.
Just hold this mighty megaphone up to your lips, hold down the trigger and you're ready to begin your transformation. At the flick of a switch you have three different vocal styles to experiment with - male, female and robot!
Always fancied speaking like a Dalek? Need to leave your boss a terrifying anonymous answerphone message? The world is your oyster with the Loud Mouth Voice Changer!
Some would say that these Personalised Face Socks are a bit much, and that’s exactly why you need them in your life. Whether you want to buy a pair for yourself or as a gift for your favourite person, this delightful wardrobe accessory adds a bit of personality to the dull world of foot fashion.
Simply upload a photo of your choice (making sure it follows our printing guidelines) then our wizards will turn your image into a multi-portrait masterpiece that will make you the envy of the world.
We’re bringing Mr Whippy ice cream to the people with this Mr Creations Ice Cream Maker! Enjoy soft scoop ice cream from anywhere, at any time - not just when the ice cream man bothers his ar*e to drive around the cul-de-sac.
The ice cream maker can be used with Mr Creations’ hassle-free ‘just add water’ ice cream powders or you can follow one of the many recipes included. Each batch takes less than 30 minutes to create and delivers 350ml of delicious soft-scoop ice cream. Skip the vicious seagulls and stag-dos that plague Blighty’s seaside resorts and get your classic ice cream hit at home this year.
The aptly named ISAKOK Japanese incense sticks are a lie. Inside this cylinder is in fact a 2 and a half foot penis projectile, complete with hairy balls, that will launch itself into the face of anyone who releases it. The Cock Cannon prank gift is the perfect addition to hen parties, birthdays, or even Valentine’s Day (if you’re brave enough).
Tall glasses, short glasses, tulip glasses, dimpled glasses; they say there's a glass for every type of beer and occasion. But what about a special beer glass created just for you?
With our new Personalised Beer Stein, your favourite brew has never tasted sweeter!
This premium tankard has a classy frosted finish for that mouthwatering 'fresh from the cooler' look and features a sturdy, trigger-style handle for easy holding (and hearty cheers-ing).
Just hit the 'Personalise' button to add a cheeky message of your choice (up to 60 characters spread across 4 lines, bad beer puns are hoptional). It could be a special date, the name of your Best Man, a classic quote, a birthday message – you name it, we'll print it.
Cheers to that!
Snuggle up with Pierre and rest your head on his lovely soft shaft - or keep him on your desk to make your colleagues INSTANTLY contact HR to voice their concerns. Treat yourself to this adorable addition to your plush collection - because you’re girth it.
Please note: this is not an accurate to scale version of a human penis. Thank god.
Okay unless you're on the set of a fancy shampoo advert, that's probably not going to happen. Sorry.
But! You can still bathe luxuriously at home and pat yourself dry with our new Personalised Monogram Nature Towel. This soft and fluffy microfibre towel is embellished with leaves and can be customised with a stylised floral initial and your name - so no cheeky monkeys will pinch it!
Whether it’s for home cooking or big garden parties, this Personalised Face Cooking Apron will lighten the mood when you inevitably overcook the steaks. You can add any face you like from your own to your giftee’s celeb crush, just upload the pic and we’ll take care of the rest!
Okay so depending on your disposition this may not be the best bedroom light feature - but it is the perfectly terrifying accessory to brighten up your halloween party or slasher movie night sessions!
Illuminated by energy-efficient LEDs, this detailed 3D replica is powered by USB or batteries so you can pop this spine-chilling lamp anywhere you please - you know, like peeking out between the curtains of your bedroom window to freak out the neighbours.
Let's just say it's a disastrously hot eating experience - a right of passage (in every horrifying sense of the word). After the interviewees have endured an array of increasingly spicy sauces they're faced with the last Dab, the final hurdle in this ludicrous race. And now the notorious hot sauce has been turned into a game – Hot Ones Truth or Dab
Grab your most daring mates and get ready to battle your way through cringe-inducing trivia, and face up to some hard truths! With 250 cards worth of burning questions, you may find answering them less painful than suffering through a spoonful of the hottest sauce in the universe.
Want to know how to play? Give this video a lil' look - and who better to explain than Hot Ones' Sean Evans!
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